The Toxic Influence

Toxic influences come in all shapes and sizes. They are found in our leisure activities and hobbies, in the things we ingest into our bodies, and even in our relationships.

When was the last time you took time to evaluate the health of your mind, body, and soul?

Are you allowing garbage to enter through toxic print, music, or media?

What about the things that you are you putting into your body ?

Are you involved with people that tear you down instead of building you up?

Do you even know how to recognize if ANY of these things are happening?

8 TRAITS OF TOXIC INFLUENCES

1. MANIPULATIVE

They use the knowledge they gain about you to try and get you to do what they want. They will often twist your words or make you feel guilty to get their way.

2. THEY MAKE YOU FEEL BAD ABOUT YOURSELF

Insults are the most direct way that toxic people can make you feel bad, but most of the time the ways they affect your self-esteem are more subtle. When you are feeling happy or proud of yourself, they will find ways to “rain on your parade” or downplay your achievements. They might also act like they are smarter than you to make you feel dumb or insignificant.

3. BEING JUDGMENTAL

Everyone can be judgmental from time to time, but a toxic person is judgmental almost all of the time. They see things in black and white and criticize anything that they don’t agree with or approve of, instead of considering the circumstances or the feelings of other people.

4. NEGATIVITY

Some people just can’t seem to see the good in life. They will find something bad about everything and aren’t able to find joy in anything. Being around someone like this can make it hard for you enjoy yourself and be positive. Sometimes it can be easy to confuse the symptoms of depression for negativity, so it is worth having a conversation with someone to determine if they need help getting through depression or if they are truly being toxic.

5. PASSIVE AGGRESSION

These behaviors are a way that people express their discontent without having a conversation about their problems. This type of hostility is less obvious than anger and can be shown in a number of different ways. Some forms of passive aggression include snide comments, sabotaging the efforts of other people, and purposefully doing something or not doing something to make things inconvenient for someone or get them upset.

6. SELF-CENTERED

Toxic people care mostly about themselves. They don’t think about how their actions affect others and believe they are better than everyone else. Someone who is self-centered is focused on getting what they want and is unlikely to compromise or consider another person’s point of view.

7. DIFFICULTY MANAGING THEIR ANGER

Someone who has trouble managing their anger will make you feel like you are walking on eggshells every time you are around them. The littlest thing can trigger them into a fit of rage, and often nasty, hurtful things are said while they are in this mental state. There may be apologies the day after, but often they are insincere and the toxic person will repeat their angry, hurtful behaviors soon after.

8. CONTROLLING

One of the most dangerous traits of a toxic person is controlling behavior. They may try to restrict you from contacting your friends or family, or limit resources like transportation or access to money to restrict your ability to interact with the world around you. If you are in a situation where someone is trying to restrict your movements or communication, this is domestic abuse and requires immediate action.

DETOXIFYING YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

The first step is to identify the toxic influences in your life. Creating boundaries is the next step. Ask yourself, “What do I need to stop or get out of my life?” It may be a person, behavior or situation. What qualities would you like to see more of in yourself? What will you not accept moving forward?

As you build your confidence, you will be able to set and reinforce these new boundaries. When toxic influences cross the line, consider what you can say to them. Tell yourself, “If you do (this), I’ll leave the room.” Remind yourself that you deserve healthy relationships. 

Over time, creating boundaries and a life without toxic influences can improve mental and physical health.

P.S. Be sure to comment below!